Tuesday, April 8, 2008
An Insightful Question by a 4 year old
We continue with week 3 of no sleep, took Kaleigh to the doctor said she might have parasomnia a sleep disorder that starts in preschool, and gave us the number to sleep disorder center that I will cal tomorrow and try to set up an appointment as soon as possible. Having taken Kaleigh to the doctor this morning it threw off the schedule for the grocery store and Target. Had to wait until Madison took her nap, which try to bring a cranky toddler to the store and you are asking for trouble, so went home and she decided to play for a while before having lunch and taking a nap. Conveniently she decided she was not going to go to sleep until 1:00 so we had to wait for her to wake up. Of course by that time it was almost time for Jordan to come home from school. Managed to get some quiet time in and an hour nap which quite frankly felt like 10 minutes and poor Kaleigh was on the computer for an hour, never happens. Once everyone was awake and Jordan came home I was praying my neighbor would watch Jordan and Kaleigh so I could go to the supermarket with only one child, but she was sick and Michael came home sick from work today. So you see where this is going. After everyone has a snack and we pack up to go to the supermarket at 4:00 in the afternoon the 4 of us. Not a good start. We get there and the kids are actually well behaved. No fighting or arguing and 45 minutes went by quickly. Call Michael tell him I'm on my way with a rotisserie chicken and get home at 5:30. Finally eat around 6:00 not too late but in our house that is very late. Michael goes to bed and I am left to clean up kitchen, entertain Kaleigh and Madison while I help Jordan with homework. By the time everyone finishes and we we clean up to begin homework it's 7:00 at night, exhausted and aching from having done about 15 loads of laundry in 2 days, and pushing a car shopping cart full of food through the grocery store, I'm ready to quit. So I do homework with Jordan and send Kaleigh to watch TV (again). As I struggle through Madison begins to cry at the top of her lungs, which I ignore for about 15 minutes till finally I can't take it anymore. I scream to Michael to come get Madison as I hear him mumble something not so nice under his breath as he comes down stairs to pick up our screaming baby. I finish up with Jordan, get Kaleigh and Jordan upstairs and I'm already fighting with Michael about not having to put Madison to bed jut to entertain her while I was finishing homework with Jordan to which he replies this poor baby is exhausted and needs to go to bed. Feeling like an eel already because I should at least be able to put them to bed (supermom complex wanting to let my husband rest and heal) I continue to pick a fight about letting me do it and Kaleigh's putting on a the same pajamas she had on last night even if she doesn't want to (normally it doesn't matter but I'm tired of doing laundry after 2 days)while Madison continues to whine. After I think I can't take another moment literally. Kaleigh nails me "Mommy how are you going to handle two screaming babies?." Is this kid perceptive or what. She kills me she always knows the heart issues. She just sees things as clear as a bell. I have no answer for her I just look at her and say "I don't know." Because quite frankly I don't have any idea how I can possibly take care of all these children, I know I'm not doing it on my own, but only God knows, but I know that only he will give me that strength, I just need to rely on him more.